To Baptize or Not To Baptize?

The idea of little unbaptized babies floating aimlessly in purgatory hurts my heart. Is that enough reason to have our boy baptized?

I have a dilemma.

Marshall is nearing the four-month mark, meaning that he is within the ideal age range to be baptized. The issue is: do we baptize him or not?

Jon and I are both Christian. He is Catholic and I am Protestant. We decided on a civil marriage because we found it hypocritical to organize a church ceremony in a building that we rarely go to, led by a minister who doesn't know us at all. Our good friend Marc-Etienne married us in the garden of a lovely restaurant one August morning in a simple, spiritual, yet non-religious ceremony. And we were thrilled with the way things panned out.

"Can't you have a civil baptism?" my dad asked the other day. While that idea seemed interesting for a split second, it got me thinking, What would he baptized into? The Church of Non-Belief? Is there a Church of Fence-Sitters? Sign me up.

I can't describe myself as a very religious person. Lately, I've only stepped foot inside a church for weddings and funerals. I, like many people, only tend to pray when things are going badly. And the only times I say grace are at Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter. Funny: these are the three times of the year that my mother serves us turkey. So, essentially, our family says grace whenever we eat a large bird. But I do believe that there is something beyond life on Earth. I guess I am covering my bases in case I do end up at Saint Pete's gates after I die. I have to have something on my CV.

Saint Peter: Did you go to church when you were alive?
Me: Occasionally. And when I did, I always put at least a fiver in the donation basket.
Saint Peter: Did you pray to God when you were alive?
Me: I did when I needed Him most. And I apologize for anything blasphemous He may have heard me say.

With the birth of my son, I have found myself giving a little shout out to God when things are going well. Jon and I are thankful for having a healthy, happy little boy. We are thankful for having the opportunity to raise him in a loving home in a terrific neighbourhood. Meanwhile, the idea of little unbaptized babies floating aimlessly in purgatory hurts my heart. Is that enough reason to have our boy baptized?

Here's the hitch: what will the Church say when I call up the minister asking for our baby to be baptized? Will he think we are hypocrites for conveniently turning to religion and expecting the Church to comply? Will he turn us away?

Marshall will know about different religions and beliefs, regardless of whether he will be baptized. Stripped down, all religions--even the Church of Non-Belief--abide by The Golden Rule. What a wonderful lesson to teach a child!

Who knows? I may choose to send Marshall to Sunday School, like my mother did when we were little. Recently, I have been reflecting on those early years, when Mom dressed us in our Sunday best and we piled into her car, listening to the CJAD trivia show on our way to church. Mom loves to sing, and what better place to belt out happy songs than in the United Church? Mom also had her hands full with three children very close in age. She got a breather when we wandered over to Sunday School half-way through the service. Eventually, Sunday mornings got a little too chaotic with school projects to finish and household chores to tend to.

While I may not visit God's house anymore, knowing that there is an ear to hear my concerns and my appreciation reassures me. Whether that ear exists is anyone's guess. We all find out eventually, only it's too late to tell our friends about it. And if I intend to cover my own bases for that day, it is only fair that I cover them for my boy, too.

Now, let's hope the Church allows us to do it.